Day 4

Post op, day 4, and Nate continues on his road to recovery. Dr. Lambert came to see him this morning and arrived just as he was starting to shave for the first time since the surgery. She said it's great to see him shaving because it's the first sign she looks for in a man because she knows that if he feels like he wants to shave, he must be starting to feel better. Nate looks great and is getting more strength every day.

The nurses were able to remove all of his IV lines today and plug everything into his Power Port. That way they don't need to stick him so often. He got bumped up on his diet to clear liquids and "enjoyed" a bowl of broth and some jello. He also felt well enough to walk all the way around the unit! Go Nate!

He was able to talk to a few people on the phone, and we got to Skype with our kids. We miss them so much. It's hard to be away from home and our normal, everyday lives.

This afternoon was a little dark and rainy here in Worcester. It made the day feel a little long. No sooner had it stopped raining, when a
 big, beautiful, full double rainbow appeared outside the window. A bunch of nurses and patients gathered around the windows to take in the view and snap a few pictures. I've never seen a rainbow as big and bright and beautiful! The picture doesn't do it justice but I thought I'd include it because it reminded me that there are beautiful things all around us and sometimes we just need to 'look up' to see them.

Day 3

Nate's doing pretty well today! So well, in fact, that he got transferred out of the ICU up to the Oncology Floor! He went for a walk, had his chest tube removed, and even got to have a green popsicle and ice chips. He's lost lots of his 'puffiness', and is looking much more like himself. He's been through a huge surgery and he's been so pleasant through it all. The ICU nurses really liked having him for their patient because he never moans or complains. He's the best patient!

Praying for the blessings to continue and for Nate to have a very quiet and uneventful recovery. Thanks for the thoughts and prayers! Love to all...

Day 2

Time in the hospital is a funny thing, so I'm not sure where Day 1 ended and Day 2 began. I do know that Nate is doing much better now than he was through the night. Ask any mom, and she'll say that her kids always wait until the doctor offices close to spike a fever or start complaining that their ears hurt. That's kind of what happened last night.

Nate was doing pretty well, even better than expected, when he took a turn for the worse with his pain control. His vital signs were all over the place, he was in and out of sleep/awareness, and he was complaining about having really bad pain. If you know Nate, he never complains, so I knew it must be pretty bad. The doctor did an ice test on his belly and it looks like the epidural wasn't covering his right side. They gave him a pain pump, added an IV drip, and another IV push med that lasts 6 hours. They also had to put him on oxygen.  It took about 8 hours to get the pain under control, but it all seems to be working together nicely.

The trade off is that the IV meds make him pretty loopy, and he slips in and out at really odd times, like right in the middle of a sentence. It's ok with me because I think he's pretty entertaining that way, and I think the time moves faster for him. He was asleep earlier and he woke up with kind of a start.  Nancy looked up at him and waved in a circular motion to get his attention, and Nate looked back at her then waved the same way with one hand then the other and said, "Wax on, wax off", and immediately fell back to sleep.

He sat up again this afternoon for about 2 hours and even went for a little walk! I'm proud of how brave he's been through all of this. He's pleased with how the surgery went, and is very hopeful about the outcome. We're both so grateful to be here and thankful for all the support we feel from everyone.


It's been awesome to have Nancy and Genn here as well. When they got here this morning I got to go back to the Hope Lodge for a shower and a little nap! I appreciate the sacrifice they've made for us! We're also so grateful to my parents, who have our cute kids! They got to visit Yellowstone today! I haven't worried about them at all. I know they're being loved and spoiled by their Grandparents and I'm so glad! Thanks Mom and Dad!

It's also been so fun to be able to talk to the kids, get texts, Face Time, and Skype with them. We miss them sooo much!

It's an amazing and humbling feeling to know that others are praying for my husband and family. I don't know how to explain, or express, the gratitude I have. I feel your prayers in an almost palpable way and it's hard to describe the feeling associated with that. While I never wanted to be "that family", I'm starting to understand why people go through a trial and say that they wouldn't trade it for all they'd learned. My wish of all wishes is that Nate and our family didn't have to suffer from this cancer, but I know that we'll be better for the experience in many ways.

Hopefully, Nate will get some really good sleep tonight!

Day 1

After a very long day, Nate finally got settled into the ICU around 11:30 last night. Dr. Lambert warned us that he wasn't going to look very good, and that he was very 'puffy'. During the procedure, he received 23 liters of fluid! When we finally got to see him, I thought he looked great! He was a little 'puffy', but compared to how he looked after his February surgery, I thought he looked like Captain America!

He had a pretty good night, and stayed under sedation for the majority of the night. At 6:00 a.m., they started to lighten his meds to see how he would do breathing more on his own and he woke right up and started breathing over the ventilator. They took the tube out and Nate's been on room air all day! The doctors were all impressed that they could extubate him so soon (after he'd had so much fluid during the procedure and it can cause a lot of swelling in the airway), and that he didn't need any oxygen to keep his levels up. His color is also really good! Dr. Lambert was impressed with his progress. They even moved him from the bed right in front of the nurse's station to a new room in the very back of the ICU!

We got him up to sitting position in a chair and he was able to stay there for almost two hours. His pain increased quite a bit after that so they just upped his epidural pain meds. He seems more comfortable now.

If all continues to go well, he'll probably move to the Oncology floor on Friday and get to have some clear liquids on Saturday. It's back to baby steps for his recovery, and it's hard to be patient, but I think he's doing an amazing job!

Thanks again for all the prayers and faith. We feel your love from all the way across the country, and we hope you can feel ours too.

The Latest...

Dr. Lambert finally came out to give us an update.  After all these hours she looked pretty exhausted, but still ready to finish the procedure.  I'm so grateful for being led to her, and I'm grateful for the dedication she has to this disease and this procedure.  I can't even imagine doing one thing for 12 to 15 hours, much less something where a life hangs in the balance.  I admire her so much! 

She ran through the whole procedure from start to finish and explained a lot.  There's a lot of great news coming out of this.  Dr. Lambert estimates that she was able to get about 98% of the tumors and mucous out.  She felt that she got enough tumor out that she still wanted to do the HIPEC in the hopes that it will kill the remaining cells in the mucous and small tumor she had to leave.  The big tumor down in his pelvis turned out to be softball size, and she was able to pull most of it out!  This is what we specifically prayed for...that the plane around the tumor that we saw on the scan would extend all the way around so it would separate with some ease.  I know it was a miracle that this tumor was relatively easy to remove.  She was also able to remove the mucous around his liver and the peritoneal lining behind it.  She removed his gall bladder, spleen, and the rest of his ommentum.   

The "less good" news is that she found a lot of sticky mucous all over his small bowel and stomach.  She was able to scrape it all off of his stomach and a good amount from his small bowel, but couldn't get it all.  She would have removed it all but his small bowel was covered in so much sticky mucous that she was afraid she would perforate it if she scraped too much.  Since she was leaving the mucous/possibly cancer cells on the small bowel, she decided to leave the tiny, stubborn bit of tumor on the rectum as well to avoid an illeostomy, another piece of good news.

The heated chemo has the possibility of killing any remaining cancer cells in the mucous and in the bit of tumor she had to leave.  We're praying that it will take care of the cancer cells, and that Nate's body can heal and take care of the rest.  I'm so grateful he was able to get the HIPEC.

Dr. Lambert also found that Nate's bowel was twisted where it was resected and repaired in his last surgery so she had to remove that portion and reconnect it. She was very surprised that he hadn't had a major complication from this. He did have a partial obstruction back in February at this site, but was able to get through it on his own which she was even more surprised about. Even more proof that he's one tough guy!

She did so much work around his liver and diaphragm that she's placing a chest tube on his right side to protect his lung.  He will remain sedated and intubated through the night in the ICU.  She said he did really well during the surgery, and that his blood pressure was great the whole time.  She started the surgery at 8:45 and finished at 10:45...for a grand total of 14 hours.

He did not have to have a blood transfusion like the scrub nurse said, but he did receive 14 liters of fluid during the procedure.  His kidneys worked perfectly through the procedure as well.  I'm so grateful that this day is almost over!  We're now in the ICU waiting room waiting for the nurses to get him settled so we can see him.

I have so much gratitude in my heart right now and hope all of you know that I sincerely appreciate all of the sweet texts, emails, and FBs you've sent.  I have an amazing support system!  I am so grateful for the faith which has been exercised on our behalf.  We have felt your prayers in our lives so often over the last 4 months.  I've had an amazing sense of peace and comfort today and I know that Nate and I have both been watched over today.  We have angels all around us, on both sides of the veil.  We are humbled and have so much gratitude. Love to all!

UPDATE!!!!!

The scrub nurse just came out to the waiting room to finally give us an update! It seems like good news, but he wasn't giving many specifics. The good news he did give is that Nate is stable and that they are starting the heated chemo, which means that Dr. Lambert must have been able to remove all of the visible tumors! Part of me can't believe that this is happening. He said that Dr. Lambert will be out to talk to us in about an hour while the chemo is being administered. Nate did have to have a blood transfusion, but we knew there was a 50/50 chance of that. He also said that when Dr. Lambert opened him up she saw that there was a lot more work to do than she anticipated from the CT scan so she stayed busy and that's part of the reason we didn't get an update until now.

I feel so much relief that they are giving the chemo. Thank you all so much for your prayers! I know Heavenly Father is watching over us. I know we have a long road ahead with the possibility of complications, but I'm so grateful that we've gotten this far! Woo Hoo!

Ten Hours and Counting...

I promise that I haven't forgotten to update the blog! We still haven't heard anything about Nate. Although it makes me anxious, I know that Dr. Lambert is probably in a zone, and is hopefully making good progress. I'm still praying that the surgery will be complete, and that she'll be able to administer the heated chemo. Please continue with your prayers too!

Thanks for all of the texts, emails and FB messages. I'm grateful that so many people love Nate almost as much as I do!

I'll update as soon as I hear something!

Surgery Day 6:00-7:30 a.m.

We arrived at the hospital at 6:00 a.m. after a reasonably good night sleep. We were immediately taken to the pre-op unit where we began preparations. Nate was in good spirits and claimed he was a "3" on the nervous scale of 0 to 10, 10 being the most nervous. I asked what he was comparing to, and if he'd ever been a 10. He said he had experienced a 10 on August 1, 1996...the day before we got married. Ever the joker!



We got to stay with him for over an hour while the surgical team prepped him. Dr. Lambert came in to talk with us and we were able to have a prayer with her. I'm so thankful for the power of prayer. It was a very calming experience for us. I know that Nate is in Heavenly Father's care today.

The anesthesiologist was getting ready to start his epidural and arterial line when we said our goodbyes. He did confirm that Nate will probably remain intubated until tomorrow morning. We said goodbye right at 7:30. It seems that they were a little ahead of schedule, but it'll still take some time to get everything set up in the O.R. I won't start the countdown until 8:30 or so.

Even though we were nervous, we both feel at peace. We know we've been led here, and we trust in Dr. Lambert and her skills. I know that she'll be guided if needed. We are in Heavenly Father's hands.
I'll have a prayer in my heart all day long.

On The Countdown

The sight seeing portion of our trip is now over. We had a great weekend together in Boston. We walked the Freedom Trail and visited Vermont to see the birthplace of Joseph Smith. Starting tomorrow, the only sites we will see will be on the inside of the hospital.

Today we drove back into Boston to pick up Nate's mom, Nancy, and my sister, Genn, at the airport. Nate is also doing his surgery prep today.

Our appointment with Dr. Lambert went well on Friday. The CT scan gave us a more clear picture of what's going on in Nate's belly. Dr. Lambert walked through the entire scan with us and showed us the problem spots. As we knew, there are a few tumors left. The scan showed mucous on his liver, on his diaphragm, on his ommentum, around his spleen, and possibly around his gallbladder. We could also see the big tumor by his sigmoid colon. It measures about 8 cm in diameter. This one will be the biggest problem to remove. She could see a nice plane between the tumor and the colon but couldn't be sure that the plane extends all the way around. We are praying that the tumor hasn't adheased to the colon and that she'll be able to remove it without having to take a lot of the colon. If she can get all of the visible tumors, mucous, and peritoneal lining, she will administer the heated chemo.

She estimates that the surgery will take 12 to 15 hours. We have to be at the hospital in the morning at 6 a.m. We'll be put in a holding area for all the preparation. They'll place the IV's, the epidural, draw blood, and we'll get to talk with Dr. Lambert again. By The time Nate gets to the OR and she's ready to start the surgery, it'll be around 9 a.m. So, the 12 to 15 hour countdown will begin at that point. He may not be out until midnight. When the surgery is over, Nate will go straight to the ICU. Since it'll be so late, Dr. Lambert said she'll probably leave him intubated overnight. So he'll be "under" for almost 24 hours. Let's all pray that he some awesome dreams! I'm grateful that he won't have to wake up for awhile. Dr. Lambert will meet with us when the surgery is done and talk with us about the outcome. At that point we'll be able to see Nate in the ICU.

Nancy, Genn, and I will be in the surgical waiting room for the duration. We expect to get periodic updates, but probably not very often. I will post to the blog every time I do get an update. If you would like to join us in our prayers, we're praying for Nate's body to be strong and able to endure the surgery, that the tumors will be able to be removed well, that Dr. Lambert will perform to the best of her ability and that we will feel peace and comfort.

Our kids are having fun with my parents up in Idaho. They're all aware of what's going on, and they continue to pray for Nate as well. I pray that they'll feel comfort and have lots of fun tomorrow! We appreciate our family for helping us so much.

Tomorrow is going to be one long day! Thanks again for all the love and prayers offered on our behalf. We've learned so much about the goodness of others. We're grateful for our blessings. I'm grateful for Nate and his amazing attitude and courage. He is my rock.

Beantown

We're here! It seems a little bit like a dream. I could definitely use that word again...surreal. We flew into Boston yesterday and drove to Worcester, a little over an hour away in rush hour. We checked into the Hope Lodge and went grocery shopping. The Hope Lodge is a really cool old Victorian home. It's huge! It's one of those places I could get lost in. It has nine patient bedrooms and is currently full. I'm grateful to stay in such a good environment. The people there seem very friendly, and everyone is kind of in the same boat. We are definitely in The Land of Cancer. After having a good month long plus break from treatments and appointments, it's kind of hard to jump right back in to having cancer be the main focus of our days again. It's not that we don't think about cancer every hour of every day, it's just that we've anticipated this part of Nate's treatment for so long. Until now its been something "in the future", and now it's here!

Today Nate has all his pre op appointments. We started at 7:00 a.m. With a CT scan with contrast. We headed over to another building for pre op testing which included blood draws, an EKG, a physical, and a pre op with anesthesiology. They ordered a chest X-ray so now we're back in radiology. We have our consultation with Dr Lambert at 1:40 in another building about a mile away where she'll look at the scan and X-ray with us, do another physical exam, give us a tour of the hospital and give all pre op instructions. I'm tired already! Nate's doing great!

I've already received a few texts and FB comments and want to thank everyone for the words of encouragement and offers to help. We are blessed! Also, please don't hesitate to text Nate anytime! You'd be surprised how a little text every now and then can brighten an otherwise dark day! We're heading to Boston for some sight seeing in the morning and will be back to Worcester Sunday night. I'll update when I can. Thanks for your continued prayers!